RELIGION, RELATIONSHIPS, AND A JIGSAW PUZZLE

Let’s begin with the word “religion”. What does that word mean to you, and to the people that you associate with? If you’re like most people, you will have noticed that it has many negative connotations attached to it. The obvious association that comes to mind when you hear the word “religion” is God which may be the only positive association it has. Let’s put the obvious aside for now and explore the many other common associations and responses that our society has adopted regarding religion.

To do this, please join me in this exercise by taking out a piece of paper and listing everything that comes to mind when you hear the word “religion”. I will list some common ones below:

Extremist, fanatic, self righteous, rules, old fashioned/not relevant/not enlightened, pushy, I’m not religious, boring, that’s good for you, I have my own religion, yeah whatever, I need to sleep in on Sunday, maybe later, I’m doing well on my own, I’m a good person, you’re so judgmental and intolerant, church people wouldn’t accept me and neither would God. 

Now that we’ve made this list, let's throw away the paper we've made it on and forget about religion and all that it has come to mean. Let’s cut the baggage loose and be free, but hold on to the God part, we'll come back to that aspect later.

Now, let’s go through the same exercise with the word “relationship”. Again, I will list common associations to this word below:

Love, care, communication, listening, friendship, connecting, knowing, intimacy, neighbor, forgiveness, trust, together, help, work, not alone, give, promise.

At first glance, you might be wondering what the connection is between these two exercises. I believe the difference between what these words (religion and relationship) represents, is what confuses many people and ultimately keeps them away from God. I’ll explain.

 One of the best known scripture verses in the bible is John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

In John 5:24 Jesus says: "Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life. (notice the word is “has” as in right now)

To explore the impact of this promise of eternal life, we need to understand what eternal life means. Jesus gives us this definition in chapter 17, verse 3 of this same book: 

John 17:3 Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent.

You will notice that eternal life is all wrapped around knowing the Lord. Also notice that the word know is in the present tense. To know someone is to be in relationship with him right now. The point of this verse and of all scripture is centered on the fact that God created you for relationship, and that because of sin we remain separated (out of relationship) from Him, however because of His love for us, He has provided a way back into relationship through His son Jesus. 

God has always been and will forever remain in relationship as the Trinity. Also know that He created us to be in relationship with each other and with Him. He is a God of relationships, the designer of relationships and considers them good. If you think about it, many words and ideas related to the principles of relationship are considered positive. Not so when examining the same relative to religion (remember the exercise above?). It’s not that religion in and of itself is bad or unnecessary but the main difference is that religion is man’s pursuit of God with all of our various nuances and sinful nature mixed in, while relationships themselves are a part of God’s design for His creation that we may come to know Him. Before sin cursed mankind, Adam and Eve didn’t need religion to know God because He walked with them in the garden. God created both a man and a woman to be in relationship with Him and with each other. Jesus’ earthly ministry was all about relationships built upon truth and love. Examples of relationships are found throughout the bible and they teach us many things regarding God’s purpose for our lives.

You’re probably wondering how you can be in a relationship with someone you don’t know. After all, JN. 17:3 states: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ

Have you ever dumped a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle on the table only to stare at it for a while and wonder why you ever purchased it? It seemed like a good idea at first but when you saw all the pieces, it became overwhelming. Most people will begin with simple steps: place all the pieces right side up, begin to connect the border pieces, fill in towards the center as best as they can by color and shape, then confusion sets in. If you don’t remedy the confusion, things go south quickly. What’s the remedy? You look at the picture on the box for guidance. This brings hope, relief, a clear vision and a new sense of excitement. 

The bible is that picture on the puzzle box. When you begin to read scripture with the desire to know God, He reveals Himself to you. The bible is like a love letter from your creator to you where you’ll find hope, clarity, vision, understanding, wisdom and salvation. You will find yourself in a relationship with the one true and living God.  The same one who loves you unconditionally and created you with a purpose, the one that sent His Son to bear the burden of sin for all mankind that we may have eternal life (relationship with Him). And that we might have it now.

Below are scripture verses using some of the “relationship” words from our exercise above. There are thousands of verses like these dealing with all kinds of relationships. My hope is that you will begin to see God in a new and refreshing way that will bring you new found hope and many questions. I invite you to email me with any questions you have and I will respond in a timely manner. 
pascalsdailynugget@gmail.com

Love:  John 15:12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you

Care:  Matthew 27:55 Many women were there, watching from a distance. They had followed Jesus from Galilee to care for his needs.

Listen:  Proverbs 4:1 Listen, my sons, to a father’s instruction; pay attention and gain understanding.

Friendship:  1 Samuel 20:42 Jonathan said to David, “Go in peace, for we have sworn friendship with each other in the name of the LORD, saying, ‘The LORD is witness between you and me, and between your descendants and my descendants forever.’” Then David left, and Jonathan went back to the town.

Know:  Psalm 9:10 Those who know your name trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken 

those who seek you.

Intimate:  Job 29:4 Oh, for the days when I was in my prime, when God’s intimate friendship blessed my house,

Neighbor:  Romans 15:2 Each of us should please our neighbors for their good, to build them up

.

Forgiveness:  Luke 3:3 He went into all the country around the Jordan, preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins.

Trust:  Psalm 9:10 Those who know your name trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.

Together:  Mark 10:9 Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

Help:  Exodus 4:12 Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.”

Work:  Acts 18:3 and because he was a tentmaker as they were, he stayed and worked with them.

Not alone: John 16:32 “A time is coming and in fact has come when you will be scattered, each to your own home. You will leave me all alone. Yet I am not alone, for my Father is with me.

Give:  2Corinthians 9:7 Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.

Promise:  Hebrews 6:12 We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.

The hope that lies within me: what is it and where can YOU get some?

Hope. That is a wonderful concept to dwell on, or is it a wonderful reality to depend on? For me, and many others, it’s the latter. 

What exactly is hope? As a noun, dictionary.com defines it this way: a person or thing in which expectations are centered. As a verb, the same source defines it as: to believe, desire, or trust. Either way, it has a personal significance and we all experience it in some fashion. It seems logical that we would prefer to place our hope in something that is real and based in truth rather than something that is designed to simply make us feel good. Ultimately, the feel good remedy is no remedy at all but rather a facade that offers a short lived experience which places us in a pretend world of lies. And, living a lie doesn’t enable us to leave a legacy or offer true hope. 

Sometimes, people like to place their hope in other people or events. Personally, I think it’s fine to look forward to events, and it's virtuous to hope for good things to happen to people, but is that the kind of hope we should put our faith and trust in or is it actually a wish? Hope and wish are similar at best, but different in principle. If your child’s life depended on other people all the time, wouldn’t you be a bit nervous? I mean, at some point, people fail, then what?

Here’s the bottom line. Hope is a wonderful and necessary aspect of our human existence, designed by our creator to provide assurance of our future through His promises to us. It may not be a perfect definition but it’s mine and I’m running with it. I “hope” (more like: pray) that you accept it too.

So this is how I view hope personally: Hope must be bigger than and beyond me otherwise it would be both dependent on & about me which would be a big burden to bear in my imperfection. Fortunately, there is one whom I and we can depend on, one who never changes, one who has made promises that we can build our lives around, and one who we can pass on as a legacy to our loved ones. My hope lies in the truth & promises of God. 

Below are a few (of hundreds) key bible verses that are significant promises in which God gives me hope: 

John 3:16 For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. (that’s the good news)

John 3:17 For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. (more good news)

John 3:18 “He who believes in Him is not condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. (you have a choice)

In revelation 2 & 3, Jesus makes a promise to those who overcome. This promise is made 7 times in these 2 chapters alone. In Rev. 2:7, Jesus says: “He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes I will give to eat from the tree of life, which is in the midst of the Paradise of God.”’ (reward for your efforts done in His name)

Rev. 20:15 And anyone not found written in the Book of Life was cast into the lake of fire. (not my words, His)

Rev. 21:4 And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”
(Can you imagine a life that is eternal without any sadness, pain, problems, or anything negative?)

A collection of my favorite nuggets

Seek truth and open the door, live truth and experience freedom. 

Biographies give you insight into people's lives. You can learn in days what it took someone an entire life to learn. 

If you want to change your results, change the way you think. if you change the way you think, you can change your life. 

The way you think determines your actions. Your actions determines your results.  

Give a man a fish and feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and feed him for a lifetime

Receiving something beyond joy for having reached out to someone is a blessing.

Helping others for the purpose of getting something in return beyond joy is a transaction.

Outreach is an outstretched hand to someone with no intention of getting anything back except the joy that comes from sharing God's love.

Filter the things of this world through God's Word and always prioritize your relationship with Him over everything else.

This is the time to be bold in Christ. May the Holy Spirit guide & protect you. Do not take the sign of the beast Rev. 13: 16,17

People have answers and can offer guidance. The question you must ask is: what is the source of their insight? It must be based in truth.

Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

To know the glory of God, you've got to get out of yourself and spend some time with Him.

Darkness hovers like storm clouds awaiting the signal. Those who have awakened await a different signal while the rest won't even notice the darkness.

One problem with the notion of being a "good person" as the determining factor for salvation is who defines what is a "good person".

Raising children is like a warrior crafting an arrow. You mold them, point them in the right direction and you release them

Regarding the leaving of a legacy: pass it on well enough that they'll catch it and have the passion to pass it on

We've moved from a reliance on God to self reliance and then from self reliance to a reliance on the state. Disaster

A bad experience is the best way to refine judgment which in turn, is the best way to a good experience.

A father should leave a legacy to his children by living a life of principle with a foundation built on truth & integrity. 

By design, there should be unity and relationship within our diversity. Not division and conquest. Best example? The Trinity 

When the people are afraid of the government you have tyranny, when the government is afraid of the people you have freedom.

Celebrating freedom, the resurrection, life everlasting. Celebrating Easter 

    

Success happens when we put others in a position to win. Keeping people down to control them is not success. It's slavery

The best freedom happens when someone teaches another the principles of freedom. This way it becomes self perpetuating

This bears repeating: Every time you get something for nothing someone else gets nothing for something. 

What we often think of as a reason for doing or not doing, is usually an excuse. We just don't realize it.

Why then do we keep making the same mistakes? Laziness and arrogance is the correct answer. 

It seems to me that we can make better decisions on a regular basis by knowing and understanding history. 

HISTORY will tell you tomorrow if the decisions made today were good

History will also tell you today if the decisions made yesterday were good

You grow when you're stretched, you're stretched when you step out of your comfort zone, you step out when you have a dream or, when you hear God's call and respond to it.

It's not true that practice makes perfect. Only perfect practice makes perfect, and that's not possible either.

Realize that we impose self limiting views of our abilities.

We should present ourselves in an authentic manner because perception becomes reality. Is their perception of you realistic?

It's not our role to judge others, but it is our responsibility to use discernment. 

Experience encompasses many factors and therefore really does trump head knowledge. How do I know this you ask? Experience

Radical is when someone is willing to speak or act upon things outside the "norm". By the time everyone else catches on, it's too late

While the dismantling of don't ask don't tell is on the docket, the dismantling of this country has already begun

Why complain about our problems when you wouldn’t trade yours for someone else'

It's all well and good to work hard, and we should. But a mix of working smart gets the results. 

Start with the end in mind: A dream of where you want to go, establish a plan, work smart, make adjustments, get results. 

A new day brings a new beginning. Hope and change? It's up to you

Convenience vs commitment: 
living together = convenient, marriage = commitment. Settle for = convenient, go for = commitment 

Invest with the expectation of getting a ROI. People are your greatest asset therefore your greatest investment. 

Iif you avoid being "under the circumstances", you will find the opportunity on the opposite side of your (every) challenge.

There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience, and that is not learning from experience. 

As an entrepreneur creating a team, remember to build your strengths and staff your weakness. 

I'm a nobody trying to tell everybody about somebody that can save anybody.  (Nalani’s friend)

some days are just harder than others. If you wait long enough, yesterday won't seem so bad.

There are 3 types of people: players, spectators, and those who don't even know there's a game.

Successful entrepreneurs are fueled by their dreams. The first step in the pattern for success is to define your dream

Happy wife, happy life.

If you don't want your wife to act like your mother, stop acting like a child.

People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. 

Don't take yourself so seriously. Nobody else does. 

Sometimes people just want you to listen. You don't always have to be Mr. Fix it.

Every time you get something for nothing, someone else gets nothing for something. 

Extraordinary people are simply ordinary people that are willing to do a little extra. 

People want 2 B validated and significant. It's a human need that's ever present. Be careful how U satisfy that need.  

I have found that coming to know the true and living God has given me the significance and balance in life that is necessary

Education happens in school, learning happens for a lifetime 

Think - do - grow - BECOME

Your strengths are also your weaknesses. 

Even though you know yourself better than anyone else, you’re also the one that will tend to limit your own potential. 

Many people confuse who they are with what they do. Once you figure out who you are, life becomes less confusing. 

1901-1986 Represents my grandmother's birth and death year. The small dash = her entire life.

It's also important to step out of your comfort zone because that's where you are stretched into the person you were created to be

Every challenge represents an opportunity. It's your choice to decide what you do with it

Don't just go through life, GROW through life

Your core principles determine your value system 

The biggest risk is taking no risk at all because you are then choosing a life of mediocrity. 

What is Love?

Many, if not most people have a distorted view and expectation of what love is. Let’s begin by dispelling the most common myth before we explore what love actually is and how it will affect our lives.

If you watch TV, listen to music, or have any media input in your life at all, you will have one central theme drilled into your consciousness: love is determined by how you feel. According to our society, love is inextricably tied to sex and is targeted to all classes and ages. Why? Because sex sells, and because in this "enlightened" society, we are encouraged to make decisions based on preference (how we feel today) rather than commitment. Preference is living together, commitment is marriage, preference is settle for, commitment is go for. It is impossible to have any consistency if the rules change every time the wind changes direction. It doesn’t work, it is foolishness, and it creates confusion. Confusion causes chaos and Satan would like nothing better than the dismantling of our families because of the misrepresentation of such a foundational principle as love. How you look and act will attract someone and create the feeling society calls love. While it may be true that love can in fact create certain feelings, the reverse is not true. Just because you find someone appealing in some way does not mean that there is love. There may very well be attraction, but attraction is not commitment. 

God gives us the definition of love in 1Corinthians 13:4-8

⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  ⁸ Love never fails.  

Let’s list the various attributes of God’s definition:

1. Patient
2. Kind
3. Not envious
4. Not boastful
5. Not proud
6. not dishonorable
7. not self seeking
8. not easily angered
9. keeps no record of wrong
10. does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth
11. always protects
12. always trusts
13. always hopes
14. always perseveres
15. never fails

It’s not necessary to explain what these 15 attributes mean; they are easily understood however, not easily lived by. The reason God includes them is because we all fail in one or more of these constantly. If we never failed in them, God would have no need to define love this way. To give us a look into how God views Love, look at verse 13 in this same chapter:   
¹³ And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

While it is obvious and an understatement to say that faith and hope are critical to Christianity, God says that Love is even greater.


A wise man once told me that love is a decision. Not only is love not a feeling, but it is a decision to make a commitment to these attributes God has given us. Pick the attribute(s) that you most commonly fail in and picture a situation in which you failed in that attribute. Now imagine making a conscious decision to view this situation according to God’s definition of love. How much better, stronger, encouraged, and united will your relationship be? It is a lifelong process but this is what God has for us. We will find and spread blessing as we grow in this because it’s Gods design for His creation. Us. God is the author of love, He defines it, He is perfect in it, and He desires us to be blessed by it. In fact, God is so serious about His love for us that:
Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

When you hear talk about love, or think about your own relationships, please remember to have God’s plan for your life as the foundation by which you make your decisions. Also, it would be a blessing to others to share this new found insight with them.

The importance of asking questions:

There are many benefits to getting good at asking questions. In most cases, we are conditioned to carry on conversations using a combination of listening and delivering our points. Rarely do people intentionally ask questions. Why is that? Generally, I don’t think we are trained to do so therefore, it feels awkward, as though we were intruding or being nosy. The truth is, if practiced at asking questions, it comes off quite naturally to the ears of the listener and results in several benefits to both parties.

Here are some of those benefits:

•  By asking questions, it gives the impression that you care about the person. Most people like to answer questions about their favorite topic. Them. When this becomes natural and you do it with sincerity, you will notice that your ability to establish meaningful relationships will flourish.

• The obvious by-product of asking questions is that you will learn much more than you ever could by not asking questions. One of my favorite nuggets is: an education is acquired in school but the process of learning continues for a lifetime. This certainly applies here and you should take full advantage of it.   

• Ever wonder how people get connected? It’s usually due to some level of networking whether intentional or not. When you ask questions, there is always a possibility that they may be a source that will connect you to something or someone you are seeking. Would that have happened if you hadn’t asked any questions? Probably not. The conversation would have been shorter and probably not have gone down that connecting path. The reverse is also true. If you are focused and hearing the answers, you might be the one who can become the connector.

• The last point I’d like to make regarding this, is that asking questions is a very effective form of debate. If you want to get a point across to someone who is 180 degrees from your position, how do you do it? Well, if you’re certain that you are correct and have the facts to turn someone around, you will probably explain yourself and tell them where they are in error. My experience has shown me that no matter how persuasive I am (and I can be very persuasive), people generally go back to their own way of thinking once I have left. When left to their own devices, they talk themselves right back to where you had found them. The other thing that happens is that people get defensive when you are attempting to correct them and eventually shut down. Either way the result is that you don’t help them to “see the light”. What I have witnessed is actually amazing. Rather than telling them, ask them questions and at some point, they will notice their own folly and you will have made your point. The difference? They made the decision.

TVBD success system

The TVBD success system

This system is nothing new, in fact it’s based in principle so by definition, it’s been time tested and in existence since the creation. What we’re really talking about is focusing our energy on some simple but important set of organized principles that can be executed and repeated. Over time, you’ll notice the changes taking place in your life, in part because you’ll be focused and will therefore be looking for them but primarily because you’ll be engaged in the process. 

Let’s begin by defining what success is not. Success is not tied to income, your position in life, or personal status. In fact, the disease called “status” is likened to buying things that you don’t need with money you don’t have to impress people you don’t like. 

Now that we’ve got that cumbersome load out of the way, we can discuss what success actually is. Most importantly, understand that success is personal, individual, and not to be compared to other people’s goals or achievements. In the pursuit of success, there is often personal growth that takes place and that, is an individual and very personal process.  In fact, one key element is to willingly accept your challenges and view them as opportunities.  The reason for that is simple: challenges cause you to stretch, stretching causes growth and growth means that you are getting better.  You also stretch when you have a dream.  No one is perfect, nor will they ever be. That means 2 things: first, it means that you can’t ever get to perfection so don’t beat yourself up over it. At the same time, you can’t use the fact that you’re not perfect as an excuse for staying where you are. Some say that if you don’t move forward, you’re actually losing ground. The second thing it means is that you will always have something to strive for.  You can continue to progress while raising the bar. You will never quite reach perfection but you will continue to grow and hopefully enjoy the journey. Here’s the definition of success:

Success is the progressive realization of a worthwhile dream

Let’s get into the success system:

Think – the basic truth about how you think is this; you are where you are because of how you think.  If you want to change where you are, change the way you think. In other words, you are the product of what you think about.  In order to change that, consider changing or adding to your associations.  In part, your associations are determined by the books you read.  Consider this; books give you insight into people's lives.  You can learn in days what it took someone an entire life to learn.  Be willing to think outside the box.  In other words, don’t put yourself into the little box that others have designated for you. Your creator has much more in mind for you than anyone could know. The truth is even though you know yourself better than anyone else, you’re also the one that will tend to limit your own potential.  How you think determines if you let the dream enter in.

Vision  is the fuel. Some people call it the dream.  It’s just getting to a point where you can “see” yourself as being there. You get a sense of what it actually feels like to achieve the dream. You can define it, taste it.  Most of the time, I believe that a vision is borne out of a passion, or even something that you do very well.  God created and equipped you with a purpose.  Ultimately, you will find your path when you seek God’s will for you.  Along the way, remember the challenges, the struggles, they are your friends.  If your dreams are big enough, the struggles won’t take you down and you’ll be energized to grow through life rather than go through life.  The successful person is not the one where everything works out well for them but rather the one who has grown from their struggles as a result of the journey.  Your vision will be the fuel that gets you through.  Remember this; you will end up exactly where you’re heading.  Do you want to be a wanderer or do you have a vision?  

Become is the process of achievement. Because success is actually a journey, the progressive achievement is very important.  The cool part of becoming, is that as we approach it, we then set new goals based on the vision. We know that we won’t reach perfection so it’s necessary to keep moving forward. This is why success is a progressive realization of the dream, and why it’s a journey, a lifelong journey.  You have now become your vision but, you aren’t stopping there, you keep setting new goals and refining your vision. Do you see why it’s so important to keep your dream alive? We need to keep moving forward to be productive in our lives.  This success system just happens to be a simple way to bring all the principles down to 4 simple components.   

Do. All these things you’ve been doing to bring you to becoming your vision, keep doing them. Success is really a matter of creating the proper habits.  Habits breed results and ultimately, results are what we are all after.  Here’s a simple nugget that might help you with this last step: extraordinary people are just ordinary people that do a little extra. Since we have come to understand that success is a journey, it stands to reason that these steps are to be repeated and become a part of how you live your life. 

I wish you all well in your personal journeys and would love to hear back from you with any questions or testimonies.