Robin Hood

story #1:

A young woman was about to finish her first year of college.  Like so many others her age, she considered herself to be very progressive in her ideals. As a result, she was very much in favor of higher taxes for the rich to support government programs which she believed to be the compassionate thing to do. In other words, she believed in redistribution of wealth. No problem so far she thought.

She was deeply ashamed that her father was a rather staunch conservative, a feeling she openly expressed.  Based on the lectures that she had participated in, and the occasional chat with a professor, she felt that her father had for years harbored an evil, selfish desire to keep what he thought should be his. What about those who have less?

One day she was challenging her father on his opposition to higher taxes on the rich and the need for more government programs. The self-professed objectivity proclaimed by her professors had to be the truth and she indicated so to her father.  He responded by asking how she was doing in school.

Not expecting that, she answered rather proudly that she had a 4.0 GPA, and let him know that it was tough to maintain, insisting that she was taking a very difficult course load and was constantly studying, which left her no time to go out and party like other people she knew.  She didn't even have time for a boyfriend, and didn't really have many college friends because she spent all her time studying.

Her father listened and then asked, how is your friend Audrey doing? Audrey is barely getting by she takes easy classes, never studies and barely has a 2.0 GPA.  She is so popular on campus college for her is a blast.  She's always invited to the parties and often doesn't even show up for classes because she's hung over.

Her wise father asked his daughter, why don't you go to the Dean's office and ask him to deduct 1.0 off your GPA and give it to your friend who only has a 2.0.  That way you will both have a 3.0 GPA and certainly that would be a fair and equal distribution of GPA.

The daughter visibly shocked by her father's suggestion angrily fired back, are you crazy, how would that be fair?  I've worked really hard for my grades!  I've invested a lot of time and Audrey has done next to nothing.  She played while I worked my tail off!

The father slowly smiled, winked and said gently, welcome to the conservative side of the fence.

story #2:

I recently asked my friend’s son what he wanted to be when he grows up.  
He said he wanted to be President of the United States. 

Both of his parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there. 
So I asked him, "If you were President, what would be the first thing you would do?" 
He replied, "I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people.” 

His parents proudly beamed "Wow, what a worthy goal."
Then I told him. "But you don't have to wait until you're President to do that. 
Tell you what - you can come over to my house and mow the lawn, pull weeds,
and sweep my  driveway, and I'll pay you $50. 
Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can 
give him the $50 to use toward food and a new house. How about doing something wonderful like that?" 

He thought that over for a few seconds, then looked me straight in the eye and asked, 
"Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and do the work himself, and you can just pay him the $50?" 

I said, "Welcome to the Republican Party."